Funk

I feel like I've been in this funk since I came back from Chicago/Kalamazoo. I don't want to do anything; I don't really have anything to do; I'm sleeping at odd hours; I'm whiny and complaining about everything; I'm anxious over the money I'm NOT making; etc. More than anything though is the fact that I'm not as appreciative or as in awe of the world as I usually am. I usually can find the silver lining regardless of what's going on. But right now, I just want to close my eyes and let this summer take care of itself. Wake me up when Fall comes.

Which is ridiculous! It's summertime. I'm not in classes all day. I'm not at an internship. I don't have much to worry about (besides making enough money to pay rent). I just spent a fabulous week with my friends in Chicago and some of my family in Kalamazoo. I'm off to a Bluegrass Festival this weekend. Then it's Rogue Camp in July. My best friend's wedding hoopla in August. And then a family trip to New Orleans (where I've always wanted to go)! So why do I want to close my eyes and wake up when school starts again?

I think I'm just struggling with the change of summer. As silly as that sounds. Going from a jam-packed schedule to one that's relatively open isn't easy for me. I like to be busy. I guess my struggle and therefore my goal for this summer to sit in the stillness.

To figure out how to just be.